It's Sunday.
I only watched about 10 minutes of football today. A rare thing but not totally unheard of. Especially with the funk I have been in lately. I couldn't even tell you who played who or who won.
Regin was in a church program today so we went to support her. She seems to be enjoying going to church and who knows if she will keep going now that the program is over. It's completely her choice and I try to keep my comments to a minimum. (Although I wasn't all that successful today during the program) Oh man, I feel a rant coming on. I...will...try...to...suppress...it...
Fail. (If you plan to be offended, please stop reading now. Otherwise, I can make no promises.)
Ok, so I am all for people going to church. To each their own and all that. But having children take the stage to parrot lines that they do not comprehend irritates the @#$@! out of me. I approve of Regin going to church because she makes the conscious decision to do so. I approved of her participation in the program today because she understood her lines and exactly what they meant. (I personally didn't agree with them but it is for her to decide, not me.) But to see small children reading off lines to make their parents look good to their neighbors...ARGGG! And the cherry on top is the kids that are not old enough to read being whispered their lines by an adult (not their parent) and them butchering the words to the amusement of everyone in the congregation.
I struggle with the belief that any human being can "know" anything is true. When an adult tells me their particular church is true and they "know" it (regardless of the religion) I may disagree but they can decide for themselves. They have the mental capacity and maturity to delude themselves however they want to. When someone that can't even get themselves dressed in the morning says they "know" their church is true or they testify to anything it tells me something entirely different.
To me, it means they are not being raised to think for themselves.
*Disclaimer inspired by Maxine*
I know this is incredibly unpopular amongst many of the people that read this. My goal was not to offend anyone. What is right for my family may not be right for your family. I prefer to leave important decisions like this to my kids when they are old enough to make the intelligent decision for themselves. There is no "one way" that is right or better than any other. I love you all, and puppies and kittens, and flowers...
Mark. I am sorry to hear you have been funky lately. I have noticed. I hope you can snap the hell out of it because I am not cracking up nearly enough at work these days.
ReplyDeleteI think teaching religion to children is much like teaching them anything else. For example, I never understood the Pledge of Allegiance the entire time I said it daily in school. I still know it by heart. I can now reflect and understand it. Just because I didn't understand it when I was taught it, doesn't mean I shouldn't have been taught it then. Same is true for religion. Parents teach their children what they believe. The more the children hear it, the more likely they are to remember it, whether they understand it at the time or not. Children do grow up and learn to think for themselves. They will come to a point where they will have to decide for themselves, even in regards to the 'truths' they were taught.
You are a good parent, Mark. I am glad you are so supportive.
Cheer up buddy. I have a feeling you wouldn't be so excitable if you were in your happy place. Maybe so though...
Good points, Cerra. Maxine brought up the same basic principles when I was ranting about it last night. I think the difference in our beliefs make it so we will not be able to agree on this but I think it is wonderful that we can have a dialogue about it.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I feel differently because I was never indoctrinated as a small child, but I hold firmly to the belief that a child, of proper age, should be presented with options and information and then encouraged to decide on their own about their spirituality.
I agree for the most part about everything you said!! Alot of people on Rae's biological mothers side, think im horrible because I won't let her get babtized unil she "knows" the reason for it. She is almost 10 and guess what she still dosen't understand it all!! So what does that tell ya!!
ReplyDeleteOh by the way, CHEER UP!!!!!!
Oh Mark, I love you but we have such differing opinions on almost everything.
ReplyDeleteI will say that I believe a person can be intelligent and "know" that something is true. I consider myself to be intelligent, though that may be debateable, and wether you publish my comment or not I do know that what I believe is true. I do not need proof to know that, I feel it with every fiber of my being. Believe me or don't, it makes no difference to me. I know what I know. The only person I have to answer to is God and I am comfortable with that.
I would much rather have my children believe that there is some purpose to being here and that there is something after this life, and now that Ryan is asking me all the ?'s "Why are we here, where do we come from?" I am so grateful to my parents and my faith that I have answers that I 100% believe wich is more than what some parents can say.
Anyway like you say to each his own. That is one of the great things about america, we do have the freedom to believe and worship (or not) as we choose.
I have to admit that I had to try pretty hard to not be offended by your post. Good thing I knew most of this about you already. But, I have to say there is nothing wrong with taking your kids to church to teach them good principles that will help them make good choices in life. And if in the process that means that they learn to pray by someone telling them what to say, what is wrong with that, that's how you learn. Corbin says prayer at dinner and bedtime every night, not because we make him, because he has the desire to do it, and he is 3.
ReplyDeleteI respect your opinions and you have done such a great job raising your kids, and you are a good person, but I don't really agree with you on most of this I guess.
See guys, this is why I love you. You are all smart and powerful women that happen to disagree with me in this case.
ReplyDeleteI don't think anyone is right or wrong. Just different.
I respect all of you and respect your opinions.
I love that you are willing to share with me.
Oh, and Brit, I will never censor your comments. I only block out the inappropriate ones. (IE anonymous comments to dirty sites or flamers)
As I mentioned in the post, this was not intended to offend anyone. It was merely an expression of my feelings. Regin chooses to go to church and I support her in it 100%. If she ever chooses to join a church, LDS or otherwise, I will support her in that as well.
I know that the way we are raising our children is very different (on small things) than most people. It seems to be working. Again, not better or worse than anyone else, just differently.
Keep up the great dialogue, I love it!
I check these out to see what my family is up to on a leisurely basis, I don't normally say anything but I am compelled to say something on this subject even though I am somewhat late to the table.
ReplyDeleteI'm also not trying to offend but I just want to offer the following in regards to religion and faith. I cannot believe anyone who says they know for a fact that God exists and/or that their particular religion is in fact the true religion. Religion was never meant to be based on fact. A key theme if not the key theme for any religion is "faith" and faith is not fact. I think too many confuse faith with fact. I believe that the point of faith is to keep "believing" even when it's hard to believe, God wants you to come to the conclusion through effort that you will follow him, not blindly "know", to "know" equates you to Jesus assuming Christianity is the focal religion here. If you factually "know" rather than believe then there should be no work to do on your own faith, and no effort required to maintain faith, belief or faith has to be maintained and worked on. You know 2+2=4 or the sky is blue so you don't have to maintain it and work at it to believe it am I to understand this is how religion should be too? I can't draw that conclusion. Secondly, if you "know" that you're religion is true and that God exists and truly understand that Hell is ultimate pain, then why would you ever deliberately commit a sin? (All people of religion do, if they say they don't they lie, also it's the reason for forgiveness), i think this is because of faith - and faith is not fact.
Just my two cents - I hope this isn't contentious. It's not meant to be, just a point of view.
Ted
Okay Mark, This is me expressing my take on this "Primary Reasons" article. First off I want you to know I love you! You are an awesome person, husband father and son. That being said I want you to know that I absolutely love and believe 100% in the gospel of "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints" I was raised in the church, But I want you to know that I had to gain my own testimony.I didn't rely on living on my parents testimony, I had to pray and ponder ,and learn for myself. We raised our children for the most part the way my parents raised me and my siblings. I feel that the church, along with being taught at home would give them a good foundation for them to build up thier lives. As you know,not all of our children are active in the church now, but, they are all wonderful careing and loving people, I feel that the way they were raised played a part in that.
ReplyDeleteYou are so entitled to your opinion, and I respect your right to shareit. I just wanted you to know that i don't agree with what you said. but I still think you are a super parent and person, I think the world of you.